Tinder’s probably one of the most popular and widely used dating apps out there right now. And, it’s also home to some of the wildest and funniest profiles. Whether they’re joke accounts that are going to get banned or simply a good joke made by someone earnestly using the site, these profiles will make you crack a smile while swiping.
Take Your Breath Away
She may actually be all that. Someone so stunning she can take your breath away, but smart enough to give it back. You might need to know someone who can help you start breathing again should you stop. You’ll never know when that skill could come in handy.
If You’re Over 35…
Young girls may be pretty, but that’s all they got going for them. Older women have a certain thing about them that makes them far more than simply attractive. Not to mention, recognizing a stroke is an important skill to have. You never know when you might be having one.
A Little More Than Netflix And Chill
If you get beat up at your last date, it’s understandable that you’d want something a little more than just a “Netflix and chill” buddy. At the bare minimum, you wouldn’t want to be physically assaulted by their ex.
Make And Model
You know, the more you think about it, the more you realize that you can talk about a person using car vernacular. And realizing what each of the terms refer to makes it all the more funny. And might even make you want to swipe right.
Blood Feud
Why go looking for a partner or even a friend on Tinder when you can find an enemy. But not just any enemy, a nemesis wherein your blood feud can be passed down for generations! Hatred that deep can only be found in places such as this.
When She Fell From Heaven
One of the oldest pick up lines in the book, reimagined for a new audience. What a way to explain your neck brace. And she is actually very pretty.
The Crime Of The Century
Any time someone starts their Tinder bio with “picture this” you should know you’re in for a ride. This is one of the craziest ones out there as well. And it ends with you being robbed. Yet, you’ll probably still thank her for the experience.
Great White Sharks
The great white shark has a mating call that can be heard 40 kilometers away. This person has a dating app ranged 100 kilometers. In essence, this is their own mating call.
Friends With Benefits
There are “friends with benefits”, then there are friends with benefits. Getting some health insurance is always pretty nice. Although, most people just get full-time jobs for that.
Grandfather Seeking Potential Grandson
This man’s granddaughter must have made a lot of bad decisions if he had to start running her Tinder account for her. It’s pretty obvious that he isn’t against Cheri dating, he just doesn’t want her dating any old schmuck.
Rave Reviews
This guy put in quite a bit of effort compiling these reviews from other people. And a few news organizations as well. Well, if the Washington Post is calling him an outstanding gentleman, who are we to disagree?
Traumatizing
Whenever someone calls out “Marco”, maybe you shouldn’t take that as an invitation to call back “Polo”. If you’re not at a pool, you should probably assume someone’s looking for someone named Marco.
An Actual Catfish
Ever heard of catfishing? Probably, there was an entire show that popularized the word. If you don’t understand the joke here though, then it probably won’t help to explain it. This account’s probably going to get banned.
Please Date Me
The level of desperateness probably isn’t that attractive to women. But it’s probably funny how hard he’s trying. He even brought his mom into this. Or he’s more accurately trying to get her out of it.
Old Spice
It wasn’t too long ago where the old Old Spice commercials starring Isaiah Mustafa dominated the internet. And someone’s banking on people still thinking those are funny. Fortunately for him, it is.
A Valid Reason For Wanting A Boyfriend
Yeah, this is a completely understandable reason for wanting a boyfriend. Or wanting a significant other in general. Fergilicious is a hard son to perform all by yourself.
She Don’t Need Aman
The joke she makes about her name is pretty funny by itself, as well as her trying to backpedal. Although, it might be a little confusing on what he actual name is.
Mind Swiping Up?
This is an excellent trick. If you catch yourself, you might find this hilarious. If you don’t know, swiping up on Tinder gives someone a Super Like. This means that they’ll see that you liked them and have the opportunity to match with you immediately.
A Real Tragedy
Another story that attempts to draw in matches. Someone really made a heartfelt and ridiculous story involving heelies and crashing at a bar. Would probably still swipe left though.
Looking For Some Tools
Sometimes you’re not even looking for a relationship on Tinder. Maybe you’re not even looking for enemies. Who needs Ebay when you can look for tools on Tinder.
Looking For A Third
Seriously, if you want to play Monopoly, you have to get together with this couple. It’s pretty hard to find people that are willing to play. After all, it’s a long game that’s destroyed many relationships.
At A Lake Or On A Mountain
It does seem as though every guy on Tinder is pictured at a lake with a fish. And every girl is pictured on a mountain. It’d help to explain why so few people ever match on the site and stay together.
A Match From 2080
That’s an interesting story. Well, if the timeline has to be preserved, then there’s no reason to not match with her. Then again, no one knows who exactly she was supposed to match with… Does that mean everyone has to swipe right?
He’s The Other Guy
Everyone would want to date the guy that played Shrek in Shrek: The Musical, right? Unfortunately, the man whose profile this is isn’t that guy. It’s the other one.
Everybody Do The Flop
Most of these profiles use text or their bios to make the joke. Natalya here does things a little bit differently. It’s like she goes around to different locations to get photos of herself laying on the ground like this.
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